Music

Questionable Christmas Classics

by Melissa Bobbitt
Dec 10, 2012

Weezer Bruce Springsteen The Boy Least Likely To Christmas Music Rockwell Johnny Mercer

Ah, the holidays! The perfect time of year to be among friends and family, singing time-honored songs of yuletide and celebration. But before Gramps and Little Timmy join in the harmonies, take a second look at these memorable wintertime hits. Parental guidance suggested?

The obvious one: "Baby, It's Cold Outside." This feminist's alarms go off every time I hear this one. It's playful, to be certain, but with lines like, "Say, what's in this drink?" and the male host begging, "Don't hold out," it screams bad touch. Its sentiments might have been quaint in the late 1940s when it was written, but nowadays, it's asking for trouble.
A squatter's anthem, the chorus of "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" is like the relatives that overstay their welcome. "Bring us a figgy pudding! We won't go till we get some!" they insist, invoking the gimmies. Definitely NOT the holiday spirit.
Maybe Rockwell was really scared of Santa when he performed the 1980s goofball hit "Somebody's Watching Me." Kids, SANTA IS EVERYWHERE. "He sees you when you're sleeping; he knows when you're awake..." Sounds less like a benevolent gift-giver and more like Freddy Krueger.

A bonus track to add to the creepy Christmas list: The Boy Least Likely To's Jingle My Bells. The title's self-explanatory.

More from Melissa Bobbitt (See All)

Music

Basia Bulat steps into the light with 'Shadow'

Melissa Bobbitt 0

A soul sister of Dusty Springfield and Cat Power, Basia Bulat has a haunted quality about her. Fittingly, she just released the single "Tall Tall Shadow," off the upcoming album of the same name, due...

Jul 28, 2013

Tours arcade fire Basia Bulat Dusty Springfield Florence + the Machine

Music

Occur Goes Global - The Music of Burundi

Melissa Bobbitt 0

An African nation in upheaval, Burundi has birthed some of the most passionate protest music in the world. Musicians, artists and others opposed to the tyrannical rule of President Pierre Nkurunziza write their stories in...

Jan 18, 2016

Redemption Voice Lion Story Yoya Jamal Khadja Nin Kaya-free Burundi